Product check

We've had our Audi A3 for about 10 months now... and some review notes after driving it around for this amount of time. The car drives great - handles well, small turning radius, very responsive. We got it in manual, and it's fantastic. There are several items, though, that bug the hell out of me in this car, items that make me suspect that they didn't think the design through thoroughly.

When you sit in the passenger seat, the adjustment tuner for the clock blocks your view of it. Pulling up on the parking break causes the drop-down arm-rest to pop up a bit, a flaw that our salesman tried to sell us on as being "designed that way." I'm short, so I pull the seat all the way up to the front - but lo and behold, while driving sometimes, the seat re-locks itself into another notch just behind where I've pulled (and thought locked) it up to. The glove compartment has too many, um, compartments - enough to just not allow you to fit a whole hell of a lot of whatnot into it without it not being able to close properly or your stowaway to break. There are no pockets behind the front seats. It comes pre-hardwared for their own phone, and doesn't allow for you to hard-wire your own phone into it (but then, I haven't tried taking it after-market for off-the-shelf product installs either). The salesman toted the rear windshield wiper as smart for automatically turning on and wiping if you have the windshield wipers turned on and happen to go in reverse - but I've had this not turn on 2 times during the course of my driving our car. The head rests on the front seats don't seem to go all the way down. And, if only, there's power running to the rear-view mirror for auto dimming in bright light, but damn if they couldn't have just put a navigation compass on it too.

This is an Audi, right?

Storagewise - we got the smaller vehicle because I didn't want the mom-mobile du jour (read: SUV), but we also got the hum-v of the strollers. When we have the stroller with us, it's all that can fit in the trunk. The car is narrower, which makes for great maneuverability, but it also makes for narrower trunk space. I was thinking about it the other day though - I still think that the larger the vehicle, the more crap you lug around. So, I'll stick with the smaller vehicle, and lug less shit around. It's a sacrifice one way or another - either you get the monstermobile and lug all kinds of crap like you're carrying your living room with you when you go out, or you get the smaller vehicle and have to really prioritize what you do or don't want to lug out. It's all good.

OK, so Hubby, Baby, and I have ventured our way out into restaurants of late. You can read some of my reviews at my yelp.com site, http://www.preggiechef.yelp.com. I'm still cooking, learning to do things ambidextrously and single-handedly. What did I make recently - oh yes, celebration of Hanukkah, I made my first batch of latkes and matzo ball soup. Matzo balls ended up too heavy. Latkes were just a little too thin. Alas, it is the first batch after all.

My latkes, I did find, way easier to just process everything in the food processor - potatoes and onions all together. Definitely press the potatoes and onions out to drain out before mixing in the eggs. Frying, it really was about 5 minutes a side. They weren't the best batch, but they were latkes nonetheless.

And the world's easiest chicken soup to accompany the matzo balls: whole chicken, make sure to salt/pepper/season the inside cavity, and cover in water. Add chopped carrot (coarse, just 2" pieces); whole onion skins and all, with ends cut off; and celery pieces as well. Bring to boil, and let simmer for 1/2 hour. Remove chicken, and remove legs and wings. Place legs and wings back into soup, and set aside the breast/body of the chicken. Let the soup simmer for about 2 hours. Return breast to soup for another 1/2 hour. When ready to serve, chop carrots and celery into 1/4" thick pieces.

Honestly, I've let the whole chicken simmer in the soup, no problem. Really hands free, and oh so good for our winter nights.

When all else fails...

Chicken breast, season lightly with salt and pepper each side. Pan fry to brown each side.

Place on baking sheet, and cover with tomato sauce. Bake for about 20 minutes. Take chicken out of oven, and lay on 2 slices of mozz.

Serve with pasta.

This is what I made tonight - sure shot, easy, and do-able with baby in one hand. The best part is being able to let the oven do the cooking, without having to watch it the entire time. And it's relatively healthy!

Baby enjoyed the pasta (spinach spaghettini) tonight immensely. I gave her a small plate of pasta, and she had the best time slurping up the pieces she could pick up. But then, when I gave her a small piece of my chicken, well, game over. She knew there was better food, and the spaghettini was last week's news. Alas... what can you do!

Still cooking, still persevering

So a couple of days ago, I'm talking with a friend of mine, and he remarked that out of the people knows, I'm probably the one who cooks the most. Gotta admit, I was really surprised. I mean, yeah, I cook, day in and day out, and I prep all of Baby's food, but really, out of the people that he knows? I don't know. Maybe my surprise (and longing) at hearing about my friends' meals at home being hot dogs and pizza still continues through adulthood. I don't know.

My parents, or our nanny du jour (as my mother made firing our live-in nannies a task like drinking water) as most cases were, cooked our home dinners each day. Yes, this meant that some days we had just left-overs, but these weren't left-over green bean casseroles, or left over baked chicken. These meals were all Chinese in flavor, and there were a variety of vegetables and meats we'd have. But, comparitively, I missed being able to be "normal," and that included having "normal" meals, like pizza and lasagna day in and day out. Thank god I didn't.

Now, because largely due to my varied group of friends, I hope that I'll be able to deliver to Baby and Hubby the variety of foods that is reflective of all different types of cultures in our meals. Just Chinese won't cut it any more for me, and frankly, knowing that we'd be having Chinese again got really boring at home. My cooking these days is bordering on basic (simply-seasoned protein of some sort, with steamed vegetables with salt and pepper, and at times, a sauce of some sort or a side of rice), but it's slowly starting to get ramped back up again. I'm using the skills I've learned during the course of the last 8 months of Baby's life in food prep, from pre-cutting vegetables and even portioning butter or flour, to prepping the night before for the next day's dinner, and pairing those skills with my learned ability to prep one-handed. My knowledge I've gained in trying different spices and knowing what tastes like what and how long I'd have to cook whatnot how long or when to add cream to a sauce has proved invaluable now, as chasing around little Baby is quite the task of date. I have to admit, my skill-honing came to a complete standstill with the birth of Baby, so I'm lucky that I experimented with different ingredients and methods before having Baby.

Most recently - we produced, with help from our friends Bondrew, Thanksgiving dinner at our house for 10 (this includes Baby, as she's quite capable of eating her body weight's worth at each seating). I was in charge of stuffing, side of veggies, turkey, cranberry sauce, and salad. Here's a brief rundown:

The stuffing, I took a loaf of white bread (wow, when was the last time I had white bread!), cubed it, and baked the bread, single layer, for 15 minutes at 300 for a nice crisp exterior to dry them out. I used Trader Joe's chicken/mushroom sausage, removed the casing, and browned the sausage for the fat and protein. To this, I added raisins and cranberries. Stirred this into the crusted bread, poured in chix broth, and stirred together until well coated and mixed. I baked this for about 20 minutes, at 350. My big mistake was using too much bread... the meat and bread ratio should be about equal, and many thanks to Hubby for picking out the extra bread.

The turkey - I brined it again this year, and it yielded a wonderfully juicy turkey. Brine, about 12 cups of water with 1 cup of salt, 1/4 cup of peppercorns, rosemary, thyme. I got an organic turkey this year, and marinated the turkey in the brine for 24 hours prior to baking. I tucked butter under the skin, covered with honey (bad idea, browned and caramelized too early), but otherwise, the turkey came out great. I combined the left-overs with a pre-mixed frozen mixture of veggies, with some chix stock, for a wonderful turkey soup post-Thanksgiving.

Cranberries - 2 bags of cranberries, some orange juice, rind of 1 orange, and about 3/4 cup sugar. Cooked this 10 minutes, and let stand - oh yum!

So that's the quick rundown of our Thanksgiving this year from my end. We also had mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, pumpkin roll (so good, from Bondrew!), a ham, flan, and lemon custard pie, to name a few other items. We feasted quite a bit. As did Baby. Oh boy, she was stuffed.

And now, Christmasbound!

Where did all the time fly?!

Did someone say it's November already?!

OMG. Where in hell did all the time fly this year? Yes, part of it was eaten up by the "baby" event, but seriously, even my non-babed friends say the same thing. I look back, and all I can see is busy, busy, busy. Juggling work and home has been a struggle, to say the least, and spending 2 hours a day sitting in traffic is farthest from my idea of ideal.

Why are my work and home locations not closer? I keep asking myself that question. And I have to admit - having a not-so-large vehicle has kept us in check. We don't buy endlessly, we buy more mindfully, and frankly, we're much more frugal with our space. I don't think it's such a bad thing - suburbia Americana has grown an ass as large as the vehicles that occupy it, and maybe it is high time that we are all a little more mindful and a little less wasteful - lest one day we have to explain to our children why it was that we were such consumers to leave them with a lesser world. Just a thought.

In any case... to the topic of cooking. Our dear friends Bondrew have been on regular visits to our house, and we've been to theirs for dinner as well. I do believe it's their subconscious effort to keep us afloat in our community of friends, so that we don't become those new parents that disappear for a year and then reemerge these transformed shells of their former selves. We've enjoyed our time in the kitchen, though, without fail, I end up taking care of Baby more than spend continuous time prepping in the kitchen. Grr. I do miss being able to do my kitchen dance. Maybe when Baby is able to be mobile, I'll have to fetch and carry her around less.

A wonderful nutmegged butternut squash soup at their house when we were there last for dinner - we gave some to Baby as well, mixed into her food, and she gobbled it up. The perfect dinner guest! Baby has been eating quite well, and I've continued making her food. However, I am starting to get a little lazy: I'm starting to feed her mashed up whatever it is that we're having for dinner for her dinner meal instead of feeding her just her own frozen veggies. Yes, I'm still making her veggie blocks, but I'm also now mixing it with some of our food. I'm still wary of salt and sugar in her food, but I am throwing in some mixtures of spices. Things to get her palate developed.

So what have we done between August and now? A lot of juggling, some cooking, more delivery than I would like, and even a wedding. She didn't attend the actual wedding - but she did attend the brunch the next morning. And she was quite well-behaved. I've also dragged her to a couple of happy hour events and evening events, so that she could get more used to being around large groups of people without flipping out. She does live in suburbia, where distances between humans is larger than in the city, and I'd like to make sure she doesn't become this space-eating hog without self-awareness. So we plunge.

I am finding that I'm going back to dishes that I know are sure-shots, and I'm experimenting a whole lot less - something I'm not so proud of, since before Baby, I had started to touch on wanting to try new methods and use new combinations of spices. Alas, the most recent invention I can tout is pannetone for French toast, with egg mixed with cayenne and salt. Sweet, spicy... it's about all the material I've got right now.

Here's a photo of my little beloved, from very recently! She's enjoying a slice of bread at Brasserie Les Halles. We're working our way slowly towards their beef tartar.

Next week, foie gras and truffles!

Snacking away and the dork factor

So I gotta ask this question. If all the snack companies are now aware of the problems with trans fats, then how is it that they can tout their product as "no trans fat" when, right there in their ingredients list, is "Partially Hydrogenated whatever the hell"? So is it just me, or is this false advertising?

In any case - after Baby had fallen off the bed for the first time this past Saturday (arrgh - I can still hear that thud loud and clear) while I was trying to put on the stupid Baby Bjorn thing, I decided that this strappity thing really has a high dork factor. My friend's husband takes their little Baby home in the Bjorn from our house, and he agrees. I've found that things with too many frills and no way of compacting them really are bad designs. Yes, it's this soft thing, but you ever try carrying one of those Baby Bjorns alongside your diaper bag and your way-too-heavy car seat with baby inside? It's like carrying an octopus. And I've seen some people out there who just wear the thing, without the baby in it. Talk about suburban dork factor. I mean, seriously - in this baby industry that's still fully geared towards getting the females of our population to buy all this crap, the products out there really are poorly designed for our use. Or rather, they're designed for maximum advertisement, minimal practicality.

I have found only very few things that were well designed and that have been a fully integral system. And the dangers of baby products - Hubby asked me, aren't companies concerned about what is or is not safe for babies? Hell no. Just look at some of the profit margins - you'll see safety left in some ditch in those margins. And even with the recent China recall, something tells me Fisher Price isn't going to be going out of business any time soon. Teething rings - what are those chemicals inside those teething rings? Not to mention all the plastic baby bottles in the market. Have you found natural plastic out there recently? If we are concerned about the chemicals we put into the babies bodies, we don't have to look all that hard - it's around us all day long. Granted, they may have to get used to the chemicals in our environment one day, but I'd like to think that I can give this brand new human being a fair chance at having a natural life to start. Hasn't anyone wondered about the source of all the in-vitro and fertility testing that's so prevalent now? Now let me just take a swig out of my plastic water bottle.

So yes, alas, she took a tumble. She was OK - stunned, had a little bit of red spot on her head where she hit it on our jute rug, but she wasn't disoriented, didn't seem drowsy, and didn't favor one side or another. At the end of the day, she actively grabbed the spoon I was using to feed her sweet potato, and aimed it right into her mouth. And she was pretty well yesterday. No visible bleeding, and no softness where her head hit the floor, didn't sleep more than she usually does. If she's anything like me, she's got a skull hard enough to give whomever is holding her a bloody nose. Trust me - I've been there, stars in front of my eyes and all. Growing pains...

Growth, renewal, and reflection

I've been meaning to do this for a while, and I haven't gotten a chance to yet - I really should do it soon - I've been meaning to write a letter to Baby, one that reflects my hopes and embodies my anticipatory life with Baby in these early months of her *hopefully* long and joyous life. It's something that I think about each day now, things I would say to her, things that I hope she'll appreciate one day, especially those elements of love between a Mother and her child that, unless you've had a child, I really do believe you can't quite comprehend. I mean, seriously - here is this cute little being, this brand new little human, who came into Hubby's and my life relatively shortly ago, and I went through the full spectrum of reactions and emotions - from really not being able to identify with Baby in the beginning, to connecting with it and realizing that its every cry can draw an almost hysterical reaction from me to try to help it calm down, to now holding it day after day in my embrace, in hopes that I could one day become the kind of parent that she hopes to have. Parenthood is a strange creature - and I know one day, I'll look back on these beginning months, and wonder "how the hell did I get through all that, I was so absolutely crazy!" One day.

In the mean time, this past week was not too eventful - I can't even really remember what I had cooked. I do know, one day, I made a deconstructed quesadilla, and I tried baking cheese by itself to make a cheddar/jack crisp - that was mildly successful, but the chicken that I baked for the quesadilla came out fantastic. The chicken breast that I sliced up for Hubby and me, I seasoned with garlic, oregano, salt, and parsley - quite good. Another night, we had masala burgers and fries, a la Trader Joe's - the masala burgers are amazingly good! And veggie! Yet another night, we ordered in some Thai food; and Friday night, we ordered in Pizza. Not all that eventful. Yesterday, Hubby had some colleagues over, to discuss the agenda for his class this upcoming semester at the University of Maryland. For the gathering, I picked up some cheese from our local cheese monger, some bread from our bakery, and I made some crab fritters with a spicy salsa mayo. We followed up the fritters with a simple salad and some awesome cupcakes, care of his colleagues Carl and Lisa (and their little puppy Lucia) and our favorite cupcake central, Cakelove.

I'm missing my brown rice - I may make some stir fry this week, to enjoy some brown rice. Baby has been quite cute, starting her babbling now, and really not wanting to stay seated (which, by the way, is quite tiring on our arms, but still quite cute, so we don't mind). We have also started her on some solid foods, starting with some "orange" foods - sweet potato was the food of the week, every other day. Not so much as a filler for her, but just to get her to start understanding and not minding solid foods in her diet. She took to it quite happily, after initial facial scrunches - I would have too, the tang that we've learned to overlook in favor of the sweetness of sweet potato, that she must have detected in each bite. The face she had, though, when she made that connection, that what I was feeding her was what we adults eat - it was just priceless. That metaphorical light bulb went on in her expression, and she became visibly excited about what I was feeding her. By the end of the week, she was actively grabbing at the spoon, and pushing the food into her mouth. Most of the sweet potato still ended up on her face, but hey, she's happy, so we're happy. It is quite exciting.

So for recipes... as the focus may now shift to baby food from our regular meals...

Baby's first sweet potatoes
1 sweet potato yielded about 18 one ounce servings, perfect amount for starter foods
Bake sweet potato, poked all over, and wrapped in aluminum foil, for about 40 minutes at 350 degrees, until a fork pokes easily into the sweet potato. Let cool, and cut into small pieces for mashing. The easiest way I found was to use one of those little food processors, and process in small batches with about a quarter cup of water to start. You'll know - you get to the right consistency when the mixture turns, but is not so watery, and doesn't stall.

Side note - we used filtered water and organic sweet potatoes. The more I read about them, the more I fear all those chemicals we put into our bodies - it seems to me, at some level, that it is no wonder that people these days are having trouble trying to have children, and that in-vitro has become a booming industry. Now, true, that might be just in this area, but I'd like to start Baby off on the right food, at least in the beginning. Something tells me that Frito Lay will still be around for years to come.

Crab Fritters
One container cooked crab, defrosted and shredded
1/2 cup mushrooms, mashed and shredded
1/2 cup onions, mashed and shredded (the shrooms and onions I demolished in the food processor)
Nutmeg
Salt
Pepper
Parsley
1 egg
3/4 cup panko bread crumbs

Mix all together well, and I made quenelles (shape like a rugby ball) by using two spoons, and scooping the mixture one from the other spoon back and forth, until all 3 sides were even. I did 2 batches - one was deep fried, and the other was baked, at 350 degrees for 20 minutes, top rack. The baked ones actually came out much better than the deep fried ones - I did drizzle some olive oil on top of the quenelles just prior to sticking them into the oven. Optional - broil them for about 2 minutes after they're done to just brown and crisp the top a bit more.

I served these fritters with a mayo mixture - mixed mayo with some salsa (drained of its high water content), with miniature diced habanero, chili powder, and paprika. Oh, so good!

Truths of the last month

If people really knew how tough it is to be a parent, I do sincerely believe that the human race as we know it would come to a complete halt. That realization, in light of today's attempt to get some semblance of our past independent life in, as Hubby and I marched ourselves to the local movie theater to watch a matinée showing of Harry Potter. Let's call our attempt feeble, at best. Everything seemed to start off all right, but it quickly escalated into an action-reaction dance as Baby decided that yes, indeed, she'd like to watch the movie too, and she'd like to provide active commentary during the quieter parts. I had delusions that, since there were other babies present at the matinée showing of the movie, that perhaps then we would all be in good company, and that Baby would be somewhat calm. Nope. I had stuffed her ears with a napkin, in an attempt to try to shield her ears from the noise of the theater, hoping that after I fed her, she'd *maybe* try getting a little shut-eye. Did I mention that today was a feeble attempt? Alas, to no avail - active conversation started right off with the first quite segment after she finished nursing, and I was left with a half-watched movie in the end while I tried to calm her down outside of the theater. And wouldn't you know it - she really does have a penchant for timing - just as soon as the movie ended, and everyone started pouring out of the theater, she was fast asleep. I really felt like just putting one between my eyes at that point.

Such is parenting. And I swear, if I hear my father even ask once when we think we may have a second one, I'll really just have to ask him if he thought it would be a great idea for us to have a second child, why he and my mother didn't. This whole experience has really shown me exactly what true patience is, and while yes, Hubby and I are in the upper half of the percentile possibility of wanting to have a second child, right now, if the human population were left up to me... well, let's just say that the job would have to fall to someone else.

In other food news - I am happy to report that, yes, indeed, pre-prepping food during the weekend for cooking during the week is definitely the thing to do. Especially since I'm now playing "Working Mom" the real game, that step has been a life-saver. Food prep during the weeknights has been cut down to simply assembly and saucing, as opposed to washing, prepping, and assembly/saucing. And admittedly, some nights, I do find it a lot easier to just make something that's somewhat "pre-made". Last Wednesday evening - I found ease to saute some chopped seasonal vegetables, mix with ground beef and with ricotta, boil up some penne, and layer the penne with the sauteed mixture, jarred marinara sauce, and provolone. I've made gumbo on a couple of occasions now - so easy to just start up the roux, mix in the vegetables, add some water and seasonings, and then leave alone to simmer until ready to serve. And we don't shy from ordering in - either for pick-up or delivery, though I did wish that more places around us delivered. Oh, if we were in Manhattan...

Gear reviews... yes, we have discovered the truth that babies grow incredibly quickly (I should have Baby talk to my measly vegetable garden!), and that clothing purchased for babies really should just start at the larger sizes. She's filled in to her 6-9 month clothes, even though she's still a couple weeks shy of 5 weeks. Carter onesies tend to run long and lean, so I've been getting the 9 month onesies for her since Baby's been growing laterally. The recent Fisher Price recall...at first, in the beginning, I worried that we weren't giving her enough stuff for her world and growth - but I also realized that our whole world is so new, it really is quite enough for her to take in. And then, when the recall happened this past week, I have to admit, I felt vindication for the choices that Hubby and I have made, that some of the cheap crap that we avoid out there on the shelves really are, well, cheap crap. Our Uppababy stroller still works great, though we did get a Maclaren Volo for the car and for travel, since the Uppababy was too large a stroller to take for long trips without filling up the entire trunk of our car. And we have, as parents of a girl, gotten a lot of mileage out of Trumpette's mary jane socks. The socks up the ante on her outfits, even dressing up a simple onesie outfit, and she doesn't kick off the socks like she may with shoes.

I'm still torn right now, with the plastic vs. glass bottle debate. Of course, the plastic bottle manufacturers will state left and right that their bottles are completely safe for babies - and it seems just about everyone uses the plastic bottles - but I don't believe that we see the true impact of the products we use until after a full generation has used the products. In any case, I purchased some Evenflo glass bottles just this past weekend... we'll give them a try to see how Baby takes to them. I have to believe that at some level, the more natural the ingredients in the objects we use (and not just ingest), the better they are for us.

So another weekend ends... and another week begins. We'll see what this week has in store for us.

The newest dilemma

Each day I've been away on maternity leave... no, say, each week, since things seem to change from week to week, but less from day to day... I face new dilemmas that I try to sort out in my mind. My newest one regards breastfeeding. Since I am returning to work next week, and I've been breastfeeding (with 2 supplemental pumpings a day to stock up), I'll be pumping the feedings that I don't give Baby directly while I'm at work. And even if my supply starts to diminish, as I expect that it will when I return to work since I'm not around her the whole day, the amount that I pump will still be OK for Nanny to give to Baby, since I can supplement what ever I pump (in theory, 4 pumpings total per day, while Nanny feeds only 2 to Baby, and I give the other 2 feedings to her) with the frozen milk I have stocked up for the next approximately 2 months or so - maybe just enough until she starts eating solid foods. Now my worry is this: if I pump during the day, and my supply diminishes for those feedings when Baby isn't attached directly to me (I've noticed, for example, in today's pumpings away from Baby that the quantity I make is already less than what I think she consumes per feeding), what happens during the holidays and weekends when I do feed her directly? Will she end up with less milk per feeding? Or should I just move directly to bottle-feeding her only and no longer taking her on my breast?

Ahh... dilemmas indeed. But at least for the time being, Nanny seems to be working out. Both Baby and our friends' Boybaby seem to take a strong liking to her, and Baby returned today as if from a full day at school, babbling away, letting us know all that she learned. It's really heart-warming, and reassuring, to see that she's growing more than she did when she was with only me. I'm sure part of it is the fact that Nanny is taking good care of her; and part of it is no doubt the fact that she's socializing with another baby. Maybe they'll help each other out!

This week's kitchen features - not that much so far, since it's only been 2 days this week, and we have the 4th coming up on us - we went to Father-in-Law's house for dinner on Sunday, and returned with a couple of left-over steaks, roasted potatoes, and left-over green salad. So yesterday, I used the left-over steaks, reheated it with some Spanish rice/quinoa/barley that I made from Thursday of last week, and wrapped it up in a tortilla with some of the greens. A relatively healthy dinner, alongside some baked potatoes, and very quick. This evening, we had a late dinner with some of our good friends, and Baby just went to bed (after napping in the restaurant) at 11:30 - late night for her indeed.

Since I'm starting work next week, I think this weekend will be a cooking-intensive experience. I will put to work my skills in pre-seasoning portioned proteins as well as pre-serving prep, of cutting up vegetables into various shapes and sizes for different dishes. I may also get some breakfasts ready, so that I don't have to worry about grabbing something to eat on my way out the door. We'll see how next week goes, as I am sure it will be quite disastrous - if all else fails, hell, there's always take-out.

Almost time to return to work

The past three months - they've really flown by so quickly. I have thoroughly enjoyed my time with Baby, and, especially with the establishment of her sleep schedule (we loosely followed the Twelve Hours in Twelve Weeks guidelines), it's given me a lot more energy to be able to take care of her and play with her during the day. The biggest excitement of her development so far - she is now able to see across the room, and she recognizes Hubby and me as her parents, and she smiles with glee when she sees us approaching. Other exciting experiences - she's lifting her head, trying her hardest to sit up, and she has legs with the strength that I bore when I bike-commuted to work during the earlier part of my pregnancy. We recently took a trip to Miami, and she had her first encounter with the ocean and the beach - she loved the experience immensely. I hope next time that we return to the ocean, that she'll remember her first trip.

Evening cooking ha, for the most part, returned to normal... however, our recent trip to Miami had set us back, in that she was out of her routine just long enough to not be able to get back to our home routine when we returned. Today seems to be a little better, but still not back to normal - evening dinner-prep time was spotted with temper tantrums from Baby, as much of our trip to Miami involved either her sleeping in her stroller or one of us holding her. Perhaps, then, she had enjoyed her trip to Miami too much - however, we did find that our trip went quite smoothly, so there is something to be said for spending the time to really nurture that connection between Parent and Child, and to not follow prescripted methods without conscious judgment and understanding of what we give our children.

In the same breath, hearing parents drop names of manufacturers, products, and parenting methods with other parents, like Starbucks for coffee, sends a chill up my spine each time. No amount of product can substitute for the intangibles of time and connection - and just the same, no one product, or method, is the correct one for all. It surprises me that some parents get so brainwashed into thinking that their method is the only method for all childrearing, and that their method is the correct one simply because it worked for them. I have to think that each parent learns the most about their own child, and at some point, they will learn that their method will not work for their children's children.

Like my cooking, I don't think that my method of parenting works for everyone. And like my parenting, my cooking evolves over time, as I learn little by little, bit by bit, with each dish I make and with each meal I prepare. And with parenthood, it seems that I learn even more about cooking, in faster lessons. When Baby naps during the day, I do food prep for the evening's meal. Readily-prepped single-serving proteins and pre-chopped vegetables make the final meal prep much easier, and celebrating the best of each season keeps the flavors of each meal new and fresh.

This evening, I prepared ceviche - I picked up sashimi from our local supermarket in the morning, some lime juice, and some cucumber. I mixed chopped sashimi with chopped cucumbers, apricot, jalapeno, and shrimp, and let the mixture marinate 5 hours. The sweetness of the fresh apricot cut through the tartness of the lime juice; the cucumber, the spice of the jalapeno.

Last night, we had a salad of greens, with fresh figs, alongside sliced beef that I sauteed. The beef was seasoned with salt, pepper, and garlic powder - and the beef, I had mixed with these seasonings a month ago. It was so easy, to take the pre-portioned bag of beef, and saute it for the dinner. Most meats, when I cook them, I cook them to just under completely done, and then allow the residual heat to finish the cooking, so that the meats retain their juices and don't over dry. Most vegetables during the spring and summer season, I blanch in boiling water for no more than 3 minutes. The vegetables get cooked, but they still retain their crispness and flavor - and the cooking method is so fast, easily done just prior to serving.

This upcoming week, Nanny starts working with us, and my friend Melissa and I are going to do a dry run of our weekday schedules before we really start everything up the following week. Her Baby and our Baby will spend their days growing up together this first year - I, for one, am very happy about our Nanny, as she seems like she will be able to take good care of our little bears while we make the donuts. We know this is really going to be a huge adjustment - having a little one has changed our lives, and I don't think we will go back to work with the same perspectives as when we left for maternity leave. We will keep our fingers crossed that we will make the adjustment well, and that our little bears will have the love and support they deserve from their growing family.

Long while, and Baby's growing

No, I haven't been starving myself all this time, and yes, I have been cooking quite a bit. The end of the day seems like it just disappears - I get dinner rolling along, feed Baby (who hits 3 months next week!), and have dinner - and before I know it, I'm exhausted, and it's time to hit the sack. But, here and there, I do think about this blog, and I try to keep it up, taking mental notes of what has and has not worked for me during this postpartum time.

Now that we have Baby on a napping schedule (somewhat) during the day, it affords me some scheduled time to prep for dinner, since twilight seems to be her cranky hour. I will usually start dinner in the morning during her morning nap, taking out whatever meat I'm going to cook in the evening from the freezer to let it defrost, and, at times, I'll also go ahead and season or marinate it so that by dinner time, it already has some flavor and doesn't need additional seasoning before getting cooked. Any rice, I also prep at this time, throw it into the steamer, and set it on timer to be ready by evening. Mid-afternoon, I'll usually prep the accompanying vegetables, whether it be just rinsing them or cutting them. And then, by her cranky hour, I have more time to focus on her, and I have to worry less about having to prep and entertain.

So, with that said, we did have our good friends Melissa and Scott (along with their little Baby) over for dinner the other evening. Overall, the menu was simple, since I didn't do much sauce prep. I had cubed up some pork tenderloin, seasoned with cumin/coriander/s/p/cloves, and I made a tagine dish. Heated up some oil (trick with the Le Crueset iron tagine I have is to just heat everything on low, and raise the temperature only after adding the liquid to bring it to a simmer before returning it to low) along with onions and garlic, stirred until fragrant. To the heated pan I then added chopped carrots and bell peppers. I then added the pork, stirring until lightly browned. I added some sun-dried tomatoes, dried dates, and raisins, along with additional spices - s/p, paprika, cumin, coriander, cinnamon, red pepper, cloves, and fenugreek. I added some water to just covering, put on the lid, and let it simmer for about 4 hours.

It's basically a Moroccan slow-cooker. And outside of my heavy hand with the salt, the dish came out great. On the sides, I blanched some asparagus, and we also had some mixed rice (brown basmati, red jasmine, and barley). We also started with a salad, pictured to the right here, though fancier than what I plated that evening. This was the left-over parts, that I decided to stack - the composing parts were golden beet, apricot, cucumber, and daikon. The berries - blackberries - were my addition the day after our dinner, and this stack I had for lunch. The sauce on top is tatziki,
which I purchased pre-made from our local grocery store. I really have to admit, this was an amazing stack salad. The tatziki blended wonderfully with the apricot and beets, its tartness pairing perfectly with the apricot's and beet's sweetness. The cucumbers were recalled in the tatziki, and the daikon provided just the right amount of bite to the flavors. When I added the blackberries, it made the salad even better - just a bit more sweetness to set off the tartness of the yogurt. Melissa commented that it looked amazing... but admittedly, everything is made easier with a mandoline.

And speaking of which - the mandoline I use is a ceramic one by Kyocera. I've only had it about 9 months, but it's been a great help in the kitchen. I haven't any complaints about it yet, and this is the first ceramic blade I've ever used... we shall see how the ceramic lasts.

To close out our dinner, our dear friends brought fantastic chocolate chip pound cake from Whole Foods, along with some strawberries. I made a mix of marscapone with heavy cream and sugar, and voila - we had ourselves a fabulous strawberry pound cake. The chocolate chips were just the right touch to the dessert, and they mixed wonderfully with the strawberries. So long as strawberry season is in place, this will now be my go-to dessert.

I've still be following my regimen of serving most of my meats simply, with salt and pepper, and serving sides of steamed vegetables. Now that it's summer, vegetables are quite abundant, and I'm excited about the burst of flavors for each of our meals. You know, come to think of it... most of the meals I describe are our dinners. Daytime meals are mostly simple - sometimes, it's leftovers; other times, it's a simple sandwich on croissant or fresh bread from our local bakery. And I really can't emphasize quite enough what a difference fresh foods make for a quick meal - I can have a simple sandwich, or I can have a sandwich dressed up with some fresh greens, or cucumbers, or peppers. Fruits, particularly now, make for the perfect finisher for any meal, particularly my lunches... I'm still working on tempering my sweet tooth since pregnancy.

Granted, I do have a ready stash of pre-made frozen meals in the freezer, but most times, I do bring out the fresh foods to enjoy. The frozen pre-made things, they can get stale, and the flavor dimishes so quickly... and there is nothing that upsets my palate more than foods without true flavor. So while it may seem like it's more trouble to make something from scratch, when the garden is abundant, it's actually less trouble - less seasoning needed, less covering needed, no sauces. It's high time to celebrate the return of freshness in the season.

Perception and Reality

Admittedly, these days, what cooking I'm doing shies completely to what I used to do. Granted, I still try to be a bit adventurous, but my time constraints, particularly during the dinner-prep time of the day, prevent me from doing very much without either one hand being preoccupied with holding Baby or having to dash to and fro to keep her from completely melting down from the lack of attention. And somehow, I still do put dinner on the table, albeit more simply these days, but I just need that daily outlet somehow.

So the past couple of weeks - last week, one of Hubby's friends, a fellow architect from NYC, was in town - we wined and dined with him on Wednesday. And boy, I gotta admit, it's tough preparing a dinner w/a child in hand in the middle of the week. Typically, Hubby does logistics (setting up the table, cleaning up, moving stuff around) while I do the cooking - alas, with Hubby at work, the logistics part of the program fell on me. However, I did find my newfound best friend to be most helpful: ziplock bags. Marinating and even seasoning is much easier, without having to fuss with bowl and plastic wrap or multiple utensils. I lopped into one bag 4 tilapia fillets, seasoned lightly with just salt and pepper. Into another bag went steaks, with premixed adobo seasoning and onions. And anticipating my friend Melissa (no red meat) joining us for dinner, I also marinated in another bag a couple of chicken breasts, with the same adobo seasoning, some thinly sliced onions, and juice of 4 key limes. These three bags constituted the main course - easily done.

Side dishes that evening, I chopped up some vegetables (zucchini, yellow squash), mixed with some olive oil, salt, and pepper. Starter was shrimp ceviche - quick-boiled shrimps, chopped, marinated with lime juice, salt, and pepper for about 6 hours, and then mixed with cilantro and chopped cucumbers. We also had a simple spinach salad, mixed with pre-made candied pecans and mandarin oranges (from Trader Joe's, thank goodness for their premade stuff!). For the tilapia, I also made a red bell pepper and olive chutney, in mango juice - this mixture, I made the day before, and set in the fridge overnight to let the flavors meld together. And for dessert, some fresh black berries and strawberries, served with a mixture of marscapone, heavy cream, and sugar - so good! All in all, a pretty good dinner, though by the end of the evening, I was fading quite fast, and had to excuse myself to turn in for the night.

And with mommy-brain, I can't even remember what else I cooked the rest of the week!

Alas, oh well... we come now to this week. One night, I marinated strips of beef in soy sauce, ginger, garlic, salt, and pepper - this mixture I simply dumped into a pan and baked until cooked through (about 1 pound beef strips, 350 degrees for 30 minutes). These strips went into tortilla shells with spinach and field greens, and some cheese. On the side, we had a potato salad, consisting of diced red bliss potatoes, sweet and sour cucumbers, and mayo. Last night, I prepared a beef tagine, with dates, sun-dried tomatoes, raisins, tomatoes, zucchini, and carrots, spiced with cumin, coriander, garlic, ginger, and chili powder. I started up the tagine at about 4:30, lightly fried ground ginger and garlic powder, then browned the beef, and finally mixed in the veggies and fruits. I added just enough water to cover after browning the meat, then set it on low until about 7:30. We ended up meeting with some friends out for dinner, but we did taste some of the beef and carrots... I must admit, it was damn good! We will save the tagine for another day - and yes, this is about as close to slow-cooker cooking as I would like to get.

So that was the general extent of the cooking this week. We had a couple of bad days this week, resulting in Hubby bringing home dinner and us going out for dinner. Baby is still settling into some semblance of a routine, which leads me to my rant: Parenthood is not easy. Yes, I know, we had warnings about this long before we had Baby, but the reality is that no experience, no amount of product, no discussions can really prepare you for the full-blowing experience of parenthood to your own offspring. Having your baby scream and cry in your ear for even an hour can be debilitatingly exhausting - and hell if you get a chance to relax any time after that. Some people may seem to look for an easier way out, pushing off responsibility onto others, or just ignoring the baby's cries all together, but truly, Baby's staying whether we like it or not. Unfortunately, however, the role of the mother never ends, not even in the middle of the night while the world sleeps - and the morning alarm clock is set without any hope for a snooze alarm, not without extensive rewiring.

Exhaustion is just the tip of the iceberg. And Hubby wonders how in the world it is that I got mastisis a couple of weeks ago in the first place!

And speaking of snooze and rewiring - it is now quite late. I will be catching some zzzz's before my early-morning riser wakes me up in the morning.

The rose colored glasses live on

Ha! I just read one of the articles on babycenter.com, of suggestions to help new moms boost their energy and mood through eating certain foods. Their first suggestion: breakfast. My breakfast usually doesn't even happen until noon or afterwards, much less being able to fix something to eat - try doing that when you're half starved, got a crying baby, and haven't even gotten a chance yet to go to the bathroom since you've gotten up in the morning. I've tried cooking during the day before, and it really doesn't happen - whatever it is that I cook usually ends up either overcooked or burnt. Impossible.

But, hey, it's good to have that idea out there that someone, somewhere, is really enjoying the first few months of their motherhood, like it's a damn walk in the park. Just not happening here, not in the near future. And I suspect, not for most new moms.

With that said, however, I did make a really good fish tonight. Or rather, I prepared it, then Hubby cooked it while I took a shower with Baby. Tilapia loins, sauteed in butter, with a tomato and carrot sauce. Seasoned tilapia loins with salt, pepper, and parsley. Sauteed the diced tomatoes and carrots in butter, in a pan that had remnants of the spices from my berbere this afternoon, and set the sauce to the side. Then, browned the tilapia loins in the same pan. Hubby served the tilapia loins with the sauce - tomatoes worked wonderfully with the tilapia and butter!

OK, off to rest, hopefully to get some energy renewal for tomorrow.

Damn.

OK. I really have to admit, being a mother has GOT to be the most thankless job there is in the world. Here I am, 4 o'clock in the morning, having fed Baby at 2:30, and she's still awake, practicing her language skills no less. I've had a collective 6 hours of sleep in the past 36 hours, and my patience is nearing its end - and unfortunately, this is the norm as opposed to the exception during this whole maternity leave. And the end of my leave will coincide with the time when she really starts to develop - it makes me think that this country REALLY has its values completely screwed up when it comes to human development.

And somehow, I can wake up in the morning, look at Baby and marvel how cute she is; but when I'm up like this in the middle of the night, I'm ready to take the first flight in the morning out of here to Barbados. And really, just set up shop and not come back.

So this leads me to my pet peeves of motherhood that all those websites and books would have you believe - but, really, are true only on TV.

8. "Take naps when your baby takes naps." OK, let's dissect this idea. Typical feeding schedule: every 3 hours, and this takes place after the typical every 2 hour feeding that happens in the first couple of weeks of a baby's life, during which time Mom's supposedly trying to heal (right, lack of sleep does not equal proper healing). Baby takes, oh, somewhere between 15 and 30 minutes to feed. Then, typically, baby does not go to sleep immediately after feeding, and oh, there's the diaper change that takes place before feeding, which can take anywhere from 5 minutes to 15 minutes, depending on whether your baby unit decides it's time for projectile anything. So there's a max given already of 45 minutes eaten out of the 3 hour clock. Then if baby decides it doesn't want to go back to sleep after it eats, well, you can be up for upwards of an hour or more entertaining the baby and interacting with it - which actually does happen with my Baby. So, an hour and a half or more later, baby finally decides it's time for a short nap - and then, guess what, the whole process starts again. Nap, I don't even have time to gather up all those bibs she's spit up on before getting ready to feed her again, much less take time out to nap!

7. "Just let others take care of chores around the house." Right. Hubby works during the day, comes home around 8, tired and hungry. I usually have dinner somewhat ready by the time he gets home, we eat, watch some TV, set Baby to bed, and then we, exhausted, also go to bed. So we're supposed to just let the plates pile up in the sink, the laundry fester, mail go unanswered and unorganized, and the piling method take over the house? This "let others take care of stuff" can actually happen if we lived in the society we used to live in, where we have a collective community that can help take care of things, not in the typical American household. Or, unless, of course, if you have hoards of money to spend on hired help - and that's assuming you also have hoards of money to pay for things like mortgages, groceries, and day care. This idea piles right in with the nap idea - it's great only if you HAVE the help around the house. Otherwise, the chores still fall on you. Oh, and try fixing dinner with screaming baby in hand.

6. "Get back into shape by taking baby out on walks." There are days when I am not even able to set foot out the door because Baby has gone fussy. I've lost weight by eating breakfast at 2, having another snack (AKA, lunch) at 4, and running up and down our stairs getting this that and the other thing and doing the chores around the house to keep it in some semblance of order. Walks, we do take them every so often, but it's not something I can plan on a regular basis.

5. "The way to take care of your baby is X, Y, and Z." There's a reason there are so many baby books out there. No one knows how exactly to take care of a baby but the parents. Everyone's got a theory, not one book has all the answers, and there's a bit of truth in everything everyone says. Which really doesn't say all that much - when baby books measure 2" in depth on average, they say enough shit that some of it is bound to stick.

4. "Get back together with your spouse." Every website I've seen touts some level of sexual intimacy like it's the duty of the woman ripped apart to mend all things back together. Ahem, lack of sleep? Where's that hired help already? Somehow, I think this idea stems from the same people who invented pantyhose.

3. "X, Y, and Z is a side effect of pregnancy." I've already dropped 30 pounds since bearing Baby, and carpal tunnel still hasn't gone away. I think it may be a side effect, period, bearing baby or not. Mood swings, I was even keeled during the whole pregnancy, and now, I have mood swings enough to bring the Titanic up from the depths of the ocean. And I have cravings for food unlike anything I felt during pregnancy. I'm sure it stems from the fact that I haven't been getting enough rest, and my body is turning to food to help replenish its energy levels. But then, cold lasagna straight from the fridge is mighty tasty...

2. That gush of love for Baby? Yeah, it happens - during the day. At night, pacifier goes into her mouth faster than I can blink. And still, she's practicing her language skills through it.

1. "Motherhood is a whole new experience." Oh yeah! Understatement of the century! Nothing can prepare you for this, no amount of babysitting, reading, watching, learning. Nothing prepares you for the pang you feel when baby is crying, right in your ear, and it's your child - and you don't know what to do to help it feel better. Granted, if my mother were around, she might be able to help me learn a bit of how to do this parenting thing - but then, there is plenty my parents did that I'd like to undo, and they took full advantage of their hospital's nursery until I was 4 months old - so unfortunately, my surviving father also has no idea what it's like to raise a newborn. It's at times like this that I really do feel like I'm treading this path alone, plodding along, and really hoping I'm doing things well by Baby.

But then, Barbados does look really appealing.

Off and on, and off and on, and on, and on

Baby has a pattern. Yes, she actually follows a pattern - which is strange and interesting all at the same time. Every other day, she's fussy and needs more holding and doting; and every other day, she's feeling more independent and able to just hang out on her own without Mom picking her up every other second. This one, she's got a mind all her own - if she wants to fuss, she'll fuss, no matter if she's in the car or in my arms. And the binky - she picks if it works or not. What seemingly has worked for other babies, not working on this one - she's gone through this life before, and nothing's fooling her.

Least of all, her younger souled father. Hubby is convinced she throws him looks of "yeah right" sometimes. Me, I was, in my paranoiac state, thoroughly convinced that when she looked lethargic that there was something wrong with her mental state. Alas, it took me a month to realize that no, she's just tired. I'm sure I'll find something else to satisfy my outward hypochondriac that could possibly be wrong with her. I'm still amazed each day that I look at her - it's like we got a new product in our house, but damn, it's a little human. And it looks like us! I don't know that any person really could design something so interesting as a mini clone, and even then, to make each model unique and different from others.

Breakfast today, alas, my cravings continue. I finished off the last piece of lasagna, straight out of the fridge, no reheating or anything. Hubby stares at me in fear whenever I tell him about these kinds of happenings, as they are things that he may do - but I kindly remind him that, ahem, it's better that I do these kinds of crazy food craving things than look at him as a female black widow looks at her mate (hmmm... dinner...). He had that fear towards the end of my pregnancy: "Shit, I've done what I was supposed to do, and now, I'm just going to be the next meal for her and all her babies!", as I was eating comparable, and sometimes more, than what he ate. And he's got another 100 lb or so on me! Well, this breastfeeding thing, coupled with lack of sleep, it's got me hungry and craving all things possible. So alas, the spider continues eating, and doting on her little one.

Yesterday was a crazy day - Baby refused to be out of my arms, even for 5 minutes, so it made things like, oh, getting a glass of water or eating breakfast (at 2pm, no less) just about impossible. By the end of the day, having cried and screamed her last bit, she finally did fall asleep for a while, in my sling (of which I just purchased a gray one, since my black one, I fear, may pick up too much heat in the summer time), thus allowing me to throw together some semblance of dinner for Hubby and me. I thawed some small squid (body and tentacles), sea scallops, and shrimp, and tossed with a bit of salt and pepper. Threw the mixture into a heated grill pan with some butter and granulated garlic - voila, instant dinner. Quick, easy, and actually, fairly tasty. I served this with some blanched carrots and left over mixed rice, from Sunday night's dinner with Hubby's father - brown and white rice, cooked prior, chilled, then sauteed with bacon and Trader Joe's soycatash, seasoned with ground coriander, cumin, garlic, salt, and pepper. Tasty, fast, 1/2 hour and the whole thing was done. Granted, having the rice already done was a fantastic shortcut, but the main part of the seafood, it was still really easy and fast.

Dinner tonight, alas, not even a fraction as elaborate, and much more low brow - Costco run, so we had a hot dog at their food stand. We made the mistake of going there without having eaten first - and now, female spider in tow, Hubby finds it is now his responsibility, as opposed to the other way around, to make sure that spouse does not pull every god damn thing off the shelf ("Ooooh, that looks good...."). What was most unfortunate after our quarter pound hot dog dinner, was the fact that I spied a family - a family, of all things! - digging into their pizza pie a couple of tables away, and I just thought it looked so damn tasty. I couldn't believe that I was still hungry. Hubby deflected successfully - he suggested that he make me a ham sandwich on croissant once we get home. And voila, we get home, and I'm not even hungry any more. Whew, Hubby lives to fight another day.

BTW, I can't celebrate enough this sling that I got - Baby feels very comfortable, like being back in the womb, and it allows me two free hands to do stuff around the house or when I'm out and about. And because it's black, it blends well with my clothes, and passersby often smile to see a little arm or a tuft of her hair sticking out past the edge of the opening. It's like seeing a little puppy in a handbag - this sling looks so much like a piece of clothing, and then when you suddenly realize that it's carrying a little human in it, well, that just tops off anyone's curious eye.

Until another day!

Wow-wee, a whole month and a bit!

Wow. Where does all the time go? Baby is doing well, learning from us as we are learning from her. The lack of sleep has become the norm as opposed to the exception, though we are slowly catching back up and extending our night-time sleep schedules... so we are slowly getting more rest. Mood swings have been up and down over the past month, as Hubby will quite readily attest, though love for Baby really can not diminish.

However, she does seem to take to temper tantrums. Harumph! We're working on tempering this characteristic.

Food-wise - well, every night, I have been preparing dinner for Hubby and me. Yes, even in the midst of taking care of a new human life, I'm carving time to put dinner on the table. Unfortunately though, it seems some times that is the only meal I'm able to put on the table - 1pm breakfast, 4pm lunch, both usually on the go while tending to Baby. But dinner, I struggle, and I fight, to carve some level of time out for myself (albeit benefiting not just me, really), to do something that I enjoy and to exercise some level of creativity. Sometimes, it is something pre-made from my pre-baby days; other days, it is simple basics, of marinated cuts of meat with sides of steamed vegetables or wild rice. Most dishes, I am still sticking to as close to the original natural form as possible. What I've found to be the best thing for a myself, as an avid cook prior to baby are raw forms of the same things I enjoyed cooking before: readily washed vegetables, cut to ready-to-serve sizes, but now pre-bagged when I have more time during the weekend for the week; and cuts of meat sized for our individual portions, so I don't have to worry about defrosting whole packs and then cutting for individual portions the same night I'm trying to serve the dish. Otherwise, our dear friends have been wonderful in bringing us casseroles and food, so that, especially in the initial weeks as we were adjusting to all the changes, we can still have something to just stick into an oven and have a meal ready to go.

Convenient way of cooking vegetables, though much less reliable for consistent results than blanching - take said vegetables, and throw them into a bowl with a little bit of water and some chopped garlic, toss together with a touch of salt and pepper, and stick them into the microwave for 3 minutes - this can be done at the end of the cooking time, so that the veggies are hot and ready to go once the rest of the meal is ready. Meat-wise, I marinate earlier in the day, even if they're frozen, so no matter the cooking method, the flavor is already ready to go, and I can adjust my cooking method at the end of the day if Baby is finding that cooking time is a perfect time to take on all characteristics fussy. Outside of these two parts of a meal, I also find pre-cooked rice to be a god-send (either cooked in my rice cooker or left over from take-out), as I can saute chopped vegetables and add the rice to the saute for a quick side (butter and heavy cream for Frenchy style, olive oil if otherwise). The oven is also a huge help, as it allows slower cooking without continuous attention at the stove.

Last week, I made some marinated pork tenderloin, with a touch of rum, some tumeric, salt, pepper, soy sauce, sugar, and onions. Hubby threw this on our grill, along with some grilled tomatoes and zucchini (zucchini was coated in olive oil, and had a sprinkling of salt and pepper, tomatoes were plain), and we also grilled some russet potatoes. Instant dinner, not too complicated, and relatively healthy! Other nights, we had pre-made tortellini, which I mixed with some pre-made marinara sauce and mozzarella for a pasta bake; pork shoulder my father brought to us from our friends' restaurant in Wayne, PA; steak with a side of steamed vegetables; egg sandwiches (Dad's night to cook!); grilled salmon on bed of mache. Days and nights do run together - and I am surprised I even remember today's date!

Gearwise... things we've found to work great for us - my New Native sling is working great to keep the little bugger close to me while I need both hands free for housework, or to even just help calm her down. She fusses at first to being put into the sling, but shortly thereafter, she settles in to be happily cuddled up against Mom. Sisters in law got us these fantastic onesies, albeit short-sleeved, that have snaps at the neck - so you can open them wider to put them over baby's head, and then snap them shut to keep her looking nice and neat - they got them from Red Envelope, but they don't seem to carry them anymore. Our stroller from Uppababy rocks, though I wished they had a sun cover for the seat and for the bassinet. I've come to realize that bibs have different sizes - I had to run out to Buy Buy Baby to get some newborn bibs when I realized that some of the bibs we got were just too big around her neck - but not to worry, as she's quickly growing into them. Baby was 8 lb 10 oz when born, now nearing about 11 lb, and she started off her days with the 3-6 month sized clothing - the 0-3 months, we didn't even get to using them, she was just that large. We've done well with having her sleep in one of the footed sleepers, to which I snipped off the feet and re-hemmed - this allows her legs to grow without limitation.

What hasn't worked...BabyGap onesies are too big at the neck (they have those overlapping fabric at the shoulders), and invariably, granted we're outfitting Baby in the 3-6 month onesies and she's all of a month old, the head opening opens all the way to the shoulders. This is great for putting the onesie on her, but to keep it on her without having her look like she's in Flashdance is another matter all together. Target had some onesies which had the zipper that runs all the way from neck to part way down one of the legs, but I couldn't fathom how logical it was to have to unzip her whole outfit to change her diaper in the middle of the night - especially when it's cold and she's asleep. I know I'd be damn pissed off if someone basically took off my sleeping clothes when it's cold out, and I'd be raising hell if they did it while I was half asleep!

Accessorywise... Socks, Baby outgrew the newborn size in the first 2 weeks - same with her hats. I'm doing quite well with our stationwagon, despite everyone touting that baby=SUV (and I'm still hoping for $5 gasoline!), and I'm finding no trouble getting her in the Snugride car seat in and out of the car, though she is getting quite heavy - and SUV or not, she+car seat will still be heavy! My one big complaint about the Snugride - it's supposed to be the infant model, but the first couple of weeks when we had her in it, it snaps into the seat so vertically (think airplane seat) that her head would end up completely slumped forward by the end of a 5 minute car ride. Of this I was very surprised, as the Snugride sits on a level surface sans the car base relatively flat, so that Baby sits level and comfortable - but just not in the car. That's my biggest gripe.

As for the whole parenting thing...the lack of sleep, continuous sleep, is tough. People had generalizations for us that parenting would result in lack of sleep, but I found that the first month is the toughest, as we are each adjusting to each others' habits and patterns. Now that we are into month 2, I can't say that everything has gotten easier, but I'm learning more and more about my little human, and she us. The first month was primarily an adjustment time for all of us, and it seems that she is much more comfortable with everything now that she's been at home about 4+ weeks. Waking in the middle of the night to feed her is now just a little easier, but each day and night is different (some nights, she's up every other hour; other nights, she'll pull about 4 hours of continuous sleep). This weekend, Hubby and I just started trading off nights and days to feed her and take care of her - he's handling the middle-of-the-night feedings on weekends. Hey, it's a start!

We made our first ever trip to the local Farmers' Market yesterday, and she enjoyed her time out with Mom in the hood. I did find, however, as I walked along, that I am again *gripe* in the same place I was at the end of the pregnancy: my clothes really don't fit. My pre-preg clothes are still too small at the waist (though the butt has gone down, yay!); but my pregger clothes are too loose and doing everything but staying on and helping Mom look somewhat publicly acceptable. Um, muu-muu anyone?

We're actually getting back into our old schedule... with modifications

So Daughter is now a new element in our lives, and we've slowly, over the course of the past week, started getting back into our old routines, with modifications of course. Yes, there are still the middle-of-the-night feeding/changing times, but now, we let her sleep and wake us up when she's ready to be fed (we were on a 2-3 hour routine before, and now, sometimes, it extends upwards of 4-5 hours between feedings), and I supplement with a couple of every 2-3 hour feedings during the day. Hubby is able to sleep somewhat through the night now, so that he can be lucid during the work day. I'm regaining some ability to do things around the house, between feedings, and I'm cooking again - though we are taking full advantage of the food gifts people have given us as well as the pre-made food items I made before Isabel came into our lives. Hubby and I went to our first party on Saturday, albeit without Daughter in tow until Doc tells us she's ready for an infusion into normal life (though I think she'd be just fine in our arms, out of reach of germy hands), and we ran some errands as well. I've taken her for walks, as has Hubby, and we're enjoying the coming spring season in DC.

Things I've cooked... well, the chicken stock left from the healing meal that Aunt and Uncle cooked for me, I made some soup from it last Thursday evening, and topped it off with a empanada shell to bake - it came out all right, though the soup was still sweet from the dates in it and it boiled a little too long and was pretty concentrated. Hubby helped assemble the salad that night, as my abdomen was still healing and I didn't want to spend too much time standing in the kitchen. We also took Daughter out last night, to get some custard at our local custard shop... and I've taken her for walks in the neighborhood, to hear all the birds and to experience the warming weather.

What else... I've been cooking for Daughter, though not directly - breastfeeding her. It took some getting used-to at first, but now, 2 weeks in, I'm feeling much more comfortable. I finally broke down, and went to the local Target and picked up a Boppy pillow to help with breastfeeding - hands still feel numbness from carpal tunnel, and I'm not sure it will ever get better - but my hands and arms truly hurt when I feed her in the wee hours of the night. Yes, I look like I should be going for a swim in the kiddie pool, but the Boppy pillow really does work. I may also invest in an electric pump, to be able to continue giving her breast milk after I go back to work. And I've found that my silicone ice-cube fun-shaped trays are great - I can make food for her, for later on, and store them in coordinating shapes based on what they are - pears for pears, apples for apples, maybe stars for vegetables, and some sort of animal for meats! Fun with food - oh why not, especially if we can use these shapes to our advantage!

So, quick summary before I feed my little one - first 2 weeks were tough, but survivable - and things do start to get better, little by little. Adjustment to a new schedule in such a short period of time is difficult, but it's worth it - especially when the little one starts opening her eyes and throws her first unadulterated, completely non-self-conscious all-gums smile at you. She's precious, we love her, and we hope to be able to give her the best life that we can.

Daughter arrives!

Baby measured large... cervix did not drop... we decided to go with a scheduled cesarean, and we've landed ourselves a baby girl! Last Wednesday, the 14th, we had ourselves a little baby girl, all 8 pounds 10 ounces of her. Seeing her for the first time was amazing - and all the things I've heard about an overwhelming unconditional love you feel for someone you've never met before is true. The past week has been a whirlwind, where I've learned that all the products that people have been touting - some of them are true to work, some are completely irrelevant. Every baby is different, and some need some items, and some need others.

For Girly... the Graco Pack-n-Play has served as a fantastic second crib, as I stayed on the first floor of our house this past week while I let my cesarean wound heal - I'm moving back up to the second floor this week. The pockets it has for the changing station have been very convenient, and the height works really well for me. I've been doing the breastfeeding thing, and I've been using the Bravado nursing pads - they're OK, not as absorbent as I would have liked. Nursing bras from Bravado are fantastic, allows nursing very easily - my regular bras are definitely not cutting it. I'm lucky that my milk did come in rather quickly, but then, when it's time to feed Girly, and she's still sleepy... well, it does make for quite a mess on Mom. Alas, what can one do...

Other things - her clothing - onesies - we go through them about one a day, some times 2 a day. We got some from Baby Gap which have been really good. There are onesies with snaps at the neck, which makes putting them on her much easier, as there are few babies that do enjoy having a shirt pulled over their heads. The kimono tops do ride up, so they're not as good - though we did get a kimono onesie that snaps at the legs, which is much better than just the top. Hats, realistically, we only need 2, since she wears them only occasionally and doesn't seem to really love them - and we put it on her only when it's cold out, and she'll grow out of them so quickly. We have a hooded towel from Dwellbaby, and she loves getting swaddled in it after a bath (which she really doesn't like). The changing stations - realistically, I only want to use a simple cloth on them, not the fancy sheets, since there are so many chances of getting them dirty (trajectory poo!!). Otherwise... coats, we really won't need them until this autumn, as, even on the day we brought her home, though it was only 40 degrees outside, once we dressed her in her going -home outfit of a long-sleeved onesie, locked her into the car seat, and bundled her up in a blanket as well as the cold-weather cover on the car seat, she was more than snuggled up happy.

Diaperwise, we've got some Seventh Generation diapers, which run pretty huge - Pampers diapers were the ones that the hospital used, and we're continuing to use them at home until she grows out of them and fits the Seventh Generation diapers better... which seems to be happening, starting... now. She's growing fast!

Swaddle blankets, we have some thin flannel ones from Buy Buy Baby, just the basic ones, and they work just fine. We also have some fancier ones from Swaddle Baby, and they're huge - good for wrapping her up for colder nights, but the other flannel ones work just as well. We've been making good use of the Graco monitors, to keep tabs on when she gets really fussy (when Hubby comes down and helps me out), and to make sure she's OK when we don't have her next to us. We have an Uppababy Vista stroller, which has worked wonderfully, and has an adapter for our Graco Snugride car seat.

It's a rollercoaster ride, but it's a fun one. I know our lives will never be the same, but all the same, I'm looking forward to making new memories with her in our life. I haven't done much cooking since getting home... but our schedule is starting to return to what it was before, albeit with changes incorporating her into the schedule. It's an amazing learning experience.

Boy, has it been a long while

How in the world did the month of February pass by so quickly? To this, I really have no idea... but we survived the baby shower, we're now just 2 weeks away from meeting our little baby, and we're slowly coming to the realization that yes, indeedy, there really is no turning back. Highlights of the month... cookingwise, I've still been cooking, enjoying the gamut of baking cakes and making little easier dishes - stuffed pastas with panna sauce, stir-fries, curries, and now, prepping some pre-made dishes to stow away in the freezer for post-baby delivery. We got ourselves a baby-safe car, and we're going to put in the car-seat base this weekend. We're coming into the final days... and we are very much looking forward to our little baby's joining us in the awake world.

Which is not to say it hasn't been awake - it's done its fair share of squiggling around and kicking, just to make sure I'm aware that it's in there. And the hiccups it gets daily... well, albeit cute, but I have to wonder how good it may feel inside in its cramped quarters. And it reacts now, to things, to voices - Hubby's voice near my belly almost always wakes it up, curious as I am sure it is as to this voice it hears. And the other day, when a foot stuck itself into my side, Hubby put his hand on the spot, and foot retracted - a good sign that reflexes are working!

Lessons learned through this last month... well, one thing, maternity clothing. No matter what clothes feel like when you first purchase them, in the final months and weeks, it will be nearly impossible to keep pants up, to hide a growing belly. Mine has been growing forward, and pants with full panels, demi panels, roll-down panels, no panels, whatever panels - they just refuse to stay up. I find myself pulling up my pants every time I get up from a chair, or even after walking a few steps. Is this fair call for a muu-muu?

And if someone could have told me, I would have purchased not as much clothing of larger size to accommodate my growing belly, but longer clothing. There really is nothing worse than having your pants fall down while your shirt rides up, all revealing the big belly that's taking over my physique. It feels like some old Popeye's cartoon, with the front panel of some gentleman's shirt rolling up and whipping him in the face. Granted, I've been lucky enough to not have my shirt whip me in the face, but damn - these shirts, no matter how wide around, do not do enough to help cover me up for the professional realm.

So what have been my favorite pieces? I've had shirts layered under sweaters through the winter - long tunic-style sweaters, some just from regular, not maternity, sizing. The longer turtlenecks of this past season from H&M have been life-savers, as have some tunic-style pieces. And my favorite pants right now are definitely my jeans. Wrap dresses, too, have been convenient, though I can't help but feel that they could really just fly open at any blow of a winter breeze. Yoga pants feel great at home, and long-sleeved T-shirts, so long as they are long enough, have helped to keep out the cold. From this pregnancy, I've had several pieces that qualify as my favorites, enough so that I may search for more of the same next time around.

As for cooking from now until baby comes... I'm going to make, like I said, some pre-made stuff that can be stored away in the freezer and easily baked/defrosted for quick little meals. Empanadas are in line, as are dumplings, little meat buns, curry pockets, and maybe even little pot pies. However, we are going to stick with our usual regimen, of not having huge dishes with left-overs for days on end... the palate gets just too bored with such limited choices. As this baby (and in particular, its head) has gotten too big for me to be able to deliver it naturally, we've elected to go with a scheduled C-section, so as to reduce risk to both myself and the little one. So, knowing that we'll be going in at a set time and day, we can actually plan around this event, and I've asked Dad to bring some little dishes down from our friends' restaurant in Philadelphia when he comes down. I've also requested some tzong-tze - bamboo-leaf wrapped seasoned rice, pork, egg, and chestnut, which can easily be heated up for instant satiation without the elaborate preparations of a multi-course meal. Of course, I'm still going to try to cook after baby joins us, but all the same, I'll walk with it down the street to our local bakery and cheesemonger, and pick up some bread and cheese. And, ambitious mindedness forward, I'm going to try cooking my own baby food, when our little one is ready.

So for now, I'm going to try to keep the blog up as much as I can, but we are coming into the final moments of just Hubby and me, before we truly become three - I think we'll need to take a bit of time, just for ourselves, to savor, before, as everyone has been pressing into our awareness, absolutely everything changes. And who knows... maybe nothing will really change. Status quo has never been my accepted reality, and we may actually be able to make this threesome work without it completely swallowing us whole.

Shower Time!

So our little baby shower is tomorrow, and I'm very excited to see all the ladies, especially my sisters in law. I requested the shower traditional way, just women. One thing that does worry me, however, is looking at our registry, people don't seem to have purchased much off the registry... and I worry, that boy indeedy, they're marching their ways to Babies-R-no wonder it's crying like it's the end of the world you dressed it up like a clown, to pick up all kinds of mass-produced crap to shower me with tomorrow, that we really don't want to see in or anywhere near our house. This fear set in full-on last weekend, when Hubby went skeet shooting with a friend of his, and he told Hubby that his wife, who will be attending the shower, was *concerned* that we didn’t have enough baby clothes on the registry, and that we didn’t have enough *stuff* on our Pack and Play (travel crib). Now you have to understand… first of all, we get the Graco Pack and Play and car seat in our house, and I have all sorts of issues about the fact that we’re getting stuff from some big-ass manufacturer (and the fact that they just have too much “stuff” printed all over their boxes in the first place - in drastic comparison, two of our friends got us the Stokke Tripp Trapp high chair, it blended right in with our regular furniture, AND the design of their boxes was just simple, clean, so European). As for the clothes… well frankly, we just didn’t want people going to Babies-R-Who the hell is going to wear that out the front door and sending us all the Winnie the Pooh and Disney crap. Hey, if we wouldn’t wear it day in, day out, why would we dress up the little human in that way?

Then, Hubby and I are like, exactly how much *stuff* does one really need to make a baby happy? Last I checked, the basic human needs were universal, independent of age – love, food, shelter. And, of course, clean underwear, but I characterize that under the shelter category. Next thing you know, they’ll be telling me exactly why it is that we need a minivan or SUV in order to really give a baby what it needs, and THEN, I’ll really lose it. I can already see the headlines: “Normally Calm Mom-to-Be Suddenly Goes Postal in Proclaiment of Social Independence”. And boy, then, I’ll really land myself in a fine mess.

My excitement and fear are now running full-on simultaneously for tomorrow's event... we shall have to see how the shower goes. And cookingwise... this week was pretty low key. Did stir-fry Monday night, with lightly sauteed Chinese cabbage, pepper beef (beef marinated in soy, salt, pepper, and stir-fried with red bell peppers). Tuesday night, I did pre-made stuff: got a can of organic Cream of Chicken, mixed together with some slices of chicken tenderloin (seasoned with just salt and pepper) and carrots, and served with bake-and-serve garlic toast (also organic).

Wednesday night, I tried my hand at miniature meat loaf for the first time in my life - and while I got the texture right, there was not enough seasoning, so unfortunately, it came out bland. Two small self-packed packs of ground beef (deck of card size), 1 egg, about half a cup of canned diced tomatoes, about half a cup of fresh bread crumbs from day-old French baguette, Adobo seasoning, thyme, and parsley. The big part I forgot was the salt and pepper... hence the blandness. Making the loaves (I made 2 miniature loaves), I put on some rubber gloves, and made the shapes lightly, much the same way I make my matzo balls. I baked them on a small cookie sheet, so that the grease can freely flow away, and not in a loaf pan (otherwise, the bottom would get really oily from the meat, and no doubt somewhat soggy. I also coupled the meat loaf with scalloped potatoes - sliced red bliss and sweet potatoes, sprinkling of flour on each layer, some salt and pepper on top, and about 1 cup of heated half-and-half poured over the mixture. The meat loaves were about 4" long x 2" wide x 2" tall, and they baked for about half an hour; the scalloped potatoes baked covered for about the same time, with an additional 15 minutes uncovered with a fresh sprinkling of mixed shredded cheese on top with paprika.

Last night - Hubby wasn't feeling terribly well, as he had come down with a bout of food poisoning... so it was just lone eating, though I did make 2 portions of food. I resorted again to pre-made stuff, some of Amy's Organic sliced polenta lightly sauteed, with fresh tomato sauce; with a side of Amy's chicken sausage. Premade again... been feeling lazy this week. I may investigate more our local organic supermarket, to see what seasonal produce and meats they have, for next week's menus.

And as for last weekend, I made a wonderful little snack - used Pillsbury Grand buttermilk biscuit mix, and filled them with some diced turkey (the turkey that my aunt had so wonderfully sent to us), dill, and shredded cheese. Alas, I made 8 of them... but by the end of the day, only 1 was left. Needless to say, between Hubby and me, they were a huge hit, perfect for nibbling as we painted on Sunday, and perfect for the rainy day that it was! I'll have to make them again, and take some photos of them, as they came out quite beautifully. I may, however, next time I make these filled biscuits, use less of the biscuit mix for each of them, as they did come out more bready than we would have liked.

So that's a rough and tumble summary of this week. Wish me luck (and patience) tomorrow!

Where did the time go??

I can't believe it - it's already the end of January - and a whole month has flown by before I was able to blink an eye. So what's the update from the kitchen... not too much. Still cooking day after day, enjoying food, belly is still growing, and little Squiglet (as we've now taken to calling it) is making a happy home for the remainder of the pregnancy. We did have some friends over for dinner recently, and we did one of our multi-course dinners... here is a brief rundown of the menu:

• Toasted challah with brush of cream and cheese (but I managed to char an entire loaf's worth of sliced challah, with the exception of 6 slices) - served with Champagne
  
• Chicken soup topped with puff pastry
• Salad (care of one of our guests, who prepared it Roman style, as she is, indeed, Roman)
• Roasted duck with orange sauce, with sides of cheesy chunky mashed white potatoes and roasted winter vegetables
• 3 cheeses (2 sheep, 1 cow)
• Hot chocolate (so easy, except for the chocolate part, which we grated - easier way would be to use chocolate chips, bittersweet - just mix with half-and-half, and you'll be good to go!)
• Dessert of apple cake, and chocolate/peanut butter sandwiches (again, care of one of our guests)

It wasn't an overly extravagant dinner, but I did learn a couple of things during the course of preparing this dinner:

1. Timing for the first courses is so key, to get everyone relaxed. Next time around, I need to make sure that I have the first courses ready to serve before the guests arrive - and it's much easier to have cold, rather than hot, courses ready to go.
2. Duck - this was my first time making duck, and it came out all right. I went to Eastern Market on the Hill for my duck breasts, and the butcher hooked me up right. Brining is key for making sure that the flavor infuses the meat. To make a brine - take about 1 part salt to 3-4 parts water, mix with other flavorants (I used peppercorns, thyme, and rosemary (herbs from our yard)), and soak the meat in the brine for 2-2.5 hours. The duck breasts being frozen, I left the brine mixture out of the fridge, and it worked just fine, as our guest were arriving 3.5 hours after I got the duck breasts into the brine. Roasting the breasts - it took quite a while, and I would estimate that I had the breasts in the oven for a good 1-1.5 hours before I felt that they were ready to go. I just recently watched an episode of Alton Brown's Good Eats - wished I had seen it before I made this duck dish! He suggests steaming the duck first, and then laying the breasts skin-side-down in a hot skillet in the oven to simply crisp the skin - that would have been wonderful contrast of texture. Alas, next time - and there will be a next time. I've saved a good portion of the rendered fat in the freezer for other use - ahh, flavorful duck!
3. Hot chocolate - in contrast to the hot chocolate I made for Hubby for our New Year's dinner, I put in too much chocolate this time, and as it cooled, it thickened very quickly. However, the mixture did make for wonderful pudding (not quite ganache texture). If need be, next time I'm going to add more half-and-half to help thin out the texture for sippable hot chocolate (instead, this time, we served the hot chocolate with coffee spoons).
4. And for parties - there's really nothing more worthy than having 2 dishwashers. Truly. We needed to dump some of our dishes into the wash half-way through, just to make some room in the kitchen... but we didn't. And it did pile up quite a bit at the end.

So that was the brief summary of our multi-course meal. Each course really can be quite small, since the guests go through such a variety of flavors through the evening; having large portions would overwhelm the palate. And being on my feet while pregnant - not so bad, though by the end of the evening, my feet were ready for a bit of TLC.

As for other meals I've been preparing... some just standard stuff, some pre-prepared from our freezer. One thing I'm noticing is that, yes, I do quite much like having the pre-prepared meals from our freezer those nights that I'm tired. HOWEVER, the pre-prepared meals I like, I still like them small enough for just 1 meal for Hubby and me, not for 20. I do like having the variety of meals from night to night, and not having the same thing 2 days in a row. Most of our left-overs... unfortunately, they really do just go straight into the trash. The palate demands variety!

So with that said, I may be preparing a variety of pre-prepared meals for Hubby and me, for when after the baby comes in about 7 weeks, enough so that we can eat comfortably without too much repetition. I may start today with making some empanadas, but I may do some to be filled with other variety of stuffings (some ideas that come to mind... Thanksgiving dinner (we got a huge peppercorned turkey from my beloved Aunt, and I'm still trying to figure out what to do with 2/3 of it), with turkey, potatoes, cheese, and some berry sauce; curry of meat and vegetables; miniature chicken pot pies). Granted, by the time little Squiglet comes into the awake world, it will be spring, and I may have my organic garden started again, so we may have some fresh greens and vegetables to celebrate the warmer season... but no doubt, we will be exhausted, and having a back-up stash of ready-to-eat food in the freezer will be quite helpful.

Will keep you posted...!

Solitary Confinement

Yes, it's longer than I can remember when I last posted to this blog. News from the home front - I pulled an abdominal muscle at the end of our Thanksgiving weekend, and managed to then trigger some contractions, land myself in the hospital for overnight observation, and end up being confined to Doc-prescribed bedrest (read: "solitary confinement") at home through December, until I was off his prescribed contraction-prevention medication. Being a doctor's child, I'm not taken to the miracles of science, and my mind started to race and wander in this lone house. There was only so much I could do here before I start missing human interaction (that started on day 2 of said solitary confinement) and before my mind really felt like it's starting to just break down and soften into the gray matter that it is. Did I take it easy? Sure, not doing much, putting my feet up, being lazy and letting Hubby take care of moving things around. Did I enjoy this time off? Hell no - this was complete and utter torture, day in and day out, counting down the hours of the day. In contrast to my active life before I got tied down, this felt like death to me. Or rather, just like Gitmo.

So, what have I been doing to keep myself busy? As soon as I could, I moved my ops downstairs from the bedroom - staying in bed never did anyone's psyche good, and definitely not for long periods of time. I saw my mother go through that struggle, once confined to her wheelchair when lupus dealt her the hand of paraplegia - talk about a woman who was so active in her life until the day she couldn't be. I don't think she ever did recover from such a huge life change - from respected opthalmologist (and surgeon) to one who, she thought, was viewed as more an invalid and at the receiving end of life, whose hands, so disfigured by lupus-induced rheumatoid arthritis, she didn't trust any longer to operate on patients' eyes and had to resign to an alternate life, one drastically different from one she had envisioned for the majority of her life. In the changes that came with her paraplegia, she was confined to long periods of hospital and bed rest while her body adjusted to the changes; personally, I believe that it was these periods of time when she was limited in her abilities that she began to believe that her abilities, truly, and her life were limited, and that her psyche began to change from one of optimism and hope to one of cynicism and bitterness. But then, aren't all our lives so limited, illness or not.

So to the couch it was, and it felt a lot better to be, at the least, surrounded by reminders of life instead of just by sheets, blankets, and more bedroom. I also continued to cook, albeit with things I already made a while ago an stowed away in the freezer. Manti one night, with yogurt sauce. Steaks that were already marinated, another night, with steamed fresh vegetables.
Chinese seafood soup, with left-over stir-fry from take-out mixed with fresh seafood, another night. Luckily, I did have things enough that were either left-over or stowed away in the freezer that we were able to have dinners prepped without too much time on my feet. And lunches, Hubby brought home lunch to me a couple of days, and I enjoyed sandwiches and other pre-made munchies other days.

But yes, I missed that thing called life.

So, that was week 1, the week I came home from the hospital. A couple of visiting highlights - on Thursday, I had 2 surprise visits from my good friends Jessica and Jessica - two different people, and one scheduled dinner visit from my good friend Melissa. The first Jessica was close by, and brought her new little baby son with her to come pay a visit - what a nice break to the monotony of the days in the house! Shortly after she left, another one of my college friends Jessica stopped by with her little son, and brought me some surprise tasty treats of cheese and bread from our local cheesemonger! A wonderfully yummy break, and again, it was wonderful to see some fresh faces. Then, Melissa, my friend, and yet another college friend, who is also pregnant at about the same time frame as me, brought some Korean bimbimbap over for dinner, and we enjoyed the bimbimbap over some good laughter and conversation. I made some vanilla cupcakes for dessert, as well as a simple salad to start. Thursday was a wonderful break; otherwise, the week would have been quite dull indeed.

By that weekend, I needed a bit of time out of the house - after our dinner Friday night, I got Hubby to walk with me to our local custadry for a bit of sweet. Boy, it felt so good to be out of the house - it truly was a breath of fresh air, enough to help me feel more alive. And less horizontal - it's amazing that That Saturday morning, I walked to the farmer's market, the last showing of fruits vegetables for the year. I picked up some local Fuji apples, and I also made a stop to one of our local bakeries for some pastries.

So that was week 1, and by week 2, I was pretty much up and running again. Not by the literal sense, not at all - however, I did manage to keep myself busy at home, doing this and that, wrapping presents, completing Christmas shopping, and taking care of keeping the house in some semblance of order and cleanliness. And by the time Christmas rolled around, the house was in good order; Hubby had surprised me one weekend with our Christmas tree; and the tree was decorated and adorned with our presents. For Christmas, Dad had come down from Philadelphia, and my father in law also came over for Christmas Day dinner. And for that dinner... my bottled creativity got an outlet.

Red roasted pork shoulder
This was a dish that Hubby had requested, to nod to tradition of pork during the holidays. Granted, little Piglet will be born in the year of the Pig - and to that, we will withdraw from consuming pork the first week of its birth. But, for Christmas - we celebrated with pork.

To a whole pork shoulder, in a medium heavy pot, of material appropriate for long slow braising in the oven, I added water, just enough to cover. In the mean time, preheat the oven to 275 degrees. Bring to boil for 30 minutes, and drain. On the stove, cover the pork shoulder again, with a mixture of soy sauce, sugar, salt, ginger, and water, and bring to a boil, for 1 hour. Approximate ratios of soy to sugar to salt to water, 1 : 1 : 1/2 : 6 - though I used too much water, and my shoulder came out somewhat bland. Ginger - I used two pieces.

Then the slow braise - I braised the shoulder for about 6 hours, and by the time it was done, the meat basically fell apart. Soft, tender, though not flavorful enough when I tasted it. Luckily, Dad came to my rescue, and recommended that I add some salt to the mixture about half an hour before the dish was scheduled to finish - and sure enough, it helped save the dish. Though the pork did not have as much depth of flavor as we've had at a restaurant one of our family friends owns in Philadelphia, it took for a good start. No doubt I will try this dish again - and hopefully with more tasteful results!


New Year's Eve. Hubby and I have taken to producing multi-course meals for our friends and colleagues; however, I have never had the pleasure of giving this treat to my own Hubby. December having been quite a trial of our patience and mortality, I thought it appropriate to have a celebratory dinner come the eve of the last day of the year. So for the dinner...

1. Bellinis. I made mine with peach puree and sparkling apple cider in lieu of champagne, Hubby's with sparkling rose and peach puree.
2. Chicken, asparagus, and parsley terrine, with cherry pear sauce. The terrine I prepared with vegetable stock. I stacked steamed asparagus with chicken and parsley on top, and poured on the stock/gelatin mixture.
3. Shepherd's pie - miniature versions, with toasted challah as the crust, in a small 2" round, stacked with roasted pork and buttered mashed potato topping.
4. Salami carpaccio with mixed greens. I used some cured beef (in lieu of the traditional raw variety), served with a mix of baby greens, olive oil, fresh squeeze of lemon juice, and freshly ground sea salt and pepper.
5. Roasted lamb chops with lemon risotto. I took advantage of Trader Joe's pre-marinated chops, roasted 2 each for us, and served with risotto cooked just to al-dente, with yet a bit of bite, and Hubby helped shave in a good portion of parmesan into the mixture. Making a small batch of this was much easier than making larger amounts for our typical 8-10 attendee parties.
6. Cheeses. From our local cheesemonger, I selected 3 hard cheeses, to help with digesting the meal.
7. King cake. I found the recipe online, baked the cake as I prepared the other dishes, and Hubby and I enjoyed the cake that evening, and for may days and evenings thereafter. This cake is a tradition of Mardi Gras proper - I decided to make this cake for reasons which I will explain below.
8. Hot chocolate. So easy, and so good when made from scratch. Half and half, mixed with shavings of bittersweet chocolate. The more chocolate, the richer. Bring to simmer, NOT BOIL, over low heat until melted. This I served in small shot glasses - as they were quite rich enough to have only in small doses, not much more.

So the background of this meal - I designed the meal along the lines of the 12 days of Christmas. The bird motifs - represented by the chicken terrine. Maids a milking, the cheese. Drummers, the shepherd's pie (in shape). Ladies dancing (Fruit of the holy spirit) - the bellinis and the pear sauce that accompanied the terrine. Lords a-leaping - the hot chocolate would be enough to send anyone leaping along through the night. 5 golden rings, well herein was the king cake.

So yes, I've been cooking, quite a bit. And yes, alas, I have left this blog to sit idle. Until now - my good friend Stef has called my attention back to it, and I can use this opportunity to continue tracking my culinary adventures and food habits as my pregnancy progresses. And yes, now, the belly has grown, quite a bit I might add. The countdown has begun to the birth date of little Piglet, who squiggles this way and that, making its presence quite known, to both Hubby and myself.

And now, for a little view of my most recent cooking adventure - this evening's dinner. Clockwise, from upper left - spicy squid with bell peppers; stir-fried chicken with mixed vegetables; salt and pepper fried shrimp; and simple stir-fried Chinese cabbage. The squid, I scored the inside of the squid pieces so that they would curl up as I stir fried them, added the bell peppers and a healthy dollop of spicy bean sauce. The chicken, I first seasoned the chicken slices with some salt, stir fried them with slices of carrots and a can of premixed Asian vegetables (baby corn, bamboo, and bean sprouts). The shrimps - just some oil, about a tablespoon, and cooked the shrimps until they curled and were opaque. A coarse grind of sea salt and black peppercorns, and the dish was done. And for the cabbage - thin slices of the stems, of about 12 leaves of cabbage, with larger slices of the leafy parts, tossed in 1 tablespoon of hot oil with baby shrimps. I added about 1/4 cup of chicken broth, covered the pan, and steamed the cabbage until done. Chinese cabbage, like most leafy vegetables, is a funny ingredient - you start with a huge pile of vegetables, and once done, the water has leached out of the vegetable and the cabbage completely deflates, to about 1/4 its original volume.

I return now to my blog - and I will try my damnest to keep it up day by day!